With wedding season back in full swing, many of you are experiencing an overwhelming social calendar as well as a rapidly declining bank account. As excited as everyone is to celebrate the big moments in the lives of family members and friends, it can be quite the personal commitment causing you to make decisions based on both time and resources. So what do you do when you simply cannot make it to them all?
- Prioritize the invitationsAs difficult as this can be, you have to get honest with yourself and decide which events are the most important to attend. Whether it is deciding between the special day of a family member or a friend, or a pre-wedding event versus an actual wedding, think about where your presence matters most and who you should “show up for” on that particular occasion.
- Review your budgetWith destination weddings, bachelor/bachelorette parties now turning into full weekend getaways, and invitations to multiple engagement parties or bridal showers being hosted for the same couple/bride, weddings and all the pre-wedding events often times involve travel. If the wedding itself involves travel or you are asked to be in the wedding party, budget those needs first. If you still have funds available to attend pre-wedding events, personally prioritize those based on budget and where you think your attendance is most important to the bride/groom.
- Have an honest conversation with the “person of honor”Sometimes you are faced with the fact you simply cannot make it to something. Whether it is due to finances or a schedule conflict, it is best to have this conversation early and to be honest with the bride/groom. Make your desire to be present known, but explain why you are unable to attend.
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- If you are faced with a schedule conflict, first do everything you can to ensure you cannot change your schedule. If there is no possible way to avoid the conflict, tell the bride/groom as soon as you know this. Express your sincere regrets and send a gift with a beautiful card. Additionally, with technology today, remember to reach out on their special day via FaceTime, a prerecorded video, and/or a thoughtful text!
- If your budget is tight and the bride/groom is close to you, you can have an honest conversation about your finances without going into actual numbers.
- If you have to make the decision between attending multiple pre-wedding events versus the wedding, let the bride/groom know you want to be there on her/his special day so you are saving your time off/finances (whatever your reason) for the “main event.”
- Perhaps you have been asked to be in the wedding party, but simply cannot afford that commitment plus the travel costs for being at the wedding and other bridal party commitments, have that conversation. Tell the bride/groom how honored you are to be asked and you want to be present for their special day, but you cannot commit to everything being asked of the bridal party. Often times, the bride/groom will understand and simply be happy with the fact you will be present on their special day.
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I hope this helps y’all navigate what I know can be a tough situation. Even if you are unable to attend it all, find a way to let the bride/groom know you are thinking about them and celebrating from afar!
Cheers, y’all!
AB
P.S. Don’t y’all love the invitations in the cover image?! Check out my friend Kelly Joyce Design for all your invitation needs!
Positively Proper 